Team Building Activities Any group, from a 3-person triad to a team, or a tribe, has a magnified effect upon it's individual members as well as upon the outside environment in which the group exists.
Group members become accountable to one another and can offer empathy and support; and this has all been shown to result in greater focus and effectiveness of the group.
We are placed into a group as soon as we are born. It is not until adulthood that we actually decide which groups we want to belong to.
We are members of a family group, and maybe a religious group, an educational group, a peer group, a hobby-based group, a social group, a political group, a community-based group, and of course, a society, and national group.
As we mature we can then choose those groups that we want to affiliate to. Those groups that we perceive as being similar to us in some significant way - perhaps through our interests, or our enforced and/or shared experiences.
As a psychotherapist I am particularly interested in the therapy group; and, as the founder of 'The Ripple Effect' Process, I am also interested in the small group involved in learning and changing as a result of Psycho-Emotional-Education.
In any group we cannot help but re-create our earlier experiences of other groups; such as in our family, or at school. We then overlay the present-day group with aspects from the past and react and behave 'as-if' we were still in that older experience.
This may show itself as mistrust, withdrawal, and shame; or alternatively perhaps as being pompous, arrogant, theatrical and over-bearing.
The group size is very significant. We can all 'hide' in a large group of 12 or more. Smaller groups of around 6 people become more intimate, intense, and thereby more rewarding as we become more attuned to others; and we involve ourself more in the group - which we perceive as a separate entity in it's own right and more than just the sum of it's members.
A group takes on it's own life if given the time and fertile ground in which to flourish.
Safety is established by a respected and experienced group leader/facilitator - although challenges may well be made to this leadership during a group's lifetime.
Having clear 'ground-rules' about what is, and is not, permitted; and having this agreed to by all members is crucial. Boundaries associated with time, venue, confidentiality, self-care and respect, also give a robust 'container' for a group.
The dynamics within a group are rich and inevitably varied. Everyone brings their own expectations, fears and needs. Everyone is trying to work out where they belong in the group and the role they will either assume for themselves, or that they will allow others to assign to them.
A group may witness, in it's members, the emergence of several 'roles' in the group; such as a leadership challenger, or a 'top-of-the-class', or a 'silent observer', an attention-seeker, a vocal 'hungry-chick' in the nest, a verbal 'sniper' and many other remnants of the past stories of the individual members. They will all sub-consciously try to re-create their own 'past-story' within an ongoing group - either to reinforce the outcome of their 'script', or in the hope of changing the ending to a more favourable one.
An experienced group leader will sensitively and firmly challenge these old-script behaviours and invite a more healthy and positive way of relating - with the added opportunity to actually try out new ways of being with, and relating to, the other group members.
A leader must be able to maintain clarity between what is real and what is being imagined and 'projected' onto the group or onto an individual within that group.
Being on the receiving end of someone else's 'projections' or 'transferences' onto you can be detrimental if these are simply accepted, unchallenged and absorbed 'as-if' they were real. That accepting of what others said about us is something we all did as children and it has shaped our self-concept. We do not now have to accept any restricting judgements, labels, or opinions. Instead we can evaluate their truth and relevance; and we can now choose to reject and discard them, in a way that we couldn't do as a child.
In a group we have the chance to check-out what is really 'me' right now, and what is just 'your stuff that is being dumped on me'. We can learn to monitor our own reactions and responses and to discard what doesn't 'fit' our actual experiences.
In a group we can also learn 'clean and clear' language - to say what we actually mean, with less chance of being misunderstood. Everyone passes what they hear through their own internal 'filter' - which derives from their own childhood. This filter may well be defective and faulty. If so, communications will be distorted and changed to mean something else - something that 'fits' their own history. They will react 'as-if' this distortion were the truth. Such processing can be unearthed and changed within a safe group - which has a ripple-effect to the outside world of the group members' relationships.
Group member's stories, and their sharing of emotions, can have a deep impact upon other group members. Stories can resonate and evoke memories in the listeners. Shared empathy and a knowing that someone else can understand our pain, fear and sadness can be a powerful healer - as long as the personal sharing is professionally facilitated and contained within the safety of the group. Enforced 'sharing' and even 'over-sharing' can have a detrimental effect upon everyone concerned!
Most groups will have a familiar dynamic of the Karpman Triangle going on. In this, there emerges a Vulnerable Victim, and a Responsible Rescuer, and a Powerful Persecutor. The Victim elicits Rescue and then turns on the rescuer and Persecutes them for having tried to rescue them. An alternative is a Rescuer looking for and setting up a Victim; and then Persecuting that victim instead of rescuing them. It is a common 'game' seen in families and in the workplace. You may not, at first, realise that this 'game' is being set-up..... and the only way out is not to play the game! This can be harder than it sounds - as old habits and patterns and dramas can be difficult to expose and revise.
The strength and safety of any group is a reflection of it's leadership. All groups go through stages - from being formed (is it a group looking for a leader, or a leader looking for a group?); to setting up and normalising the group's ground rules and boundaries; to the dynamic interactions of group members, and the agreement of an ending process.
In groups that have a specific purpose and agenda, such as in an educational or community group; these dynamics are restricted and tend to only exist in the background. They are not addressed unless the group has a stated therapeutic purpose such as personal/spiritual development.
Group experiences from the 1970's and 1980's displayed looser boundaries and ground rules. There may well have been a focus on 'catharsis' or the overt - and perhaps compulsory - display of emotions such as anger/rage and sadness/despair and the obligatory sobbing. We now know that people grow and learn better in a safe and contained/boundaried environment, and that the customary 'cushion-thrashing' of yesteryear only reinforces the attachment to the behaviour and does not enable a person to make sense of their emotions or to balance and regulate themselves.
You cannot avoid belonging to a group - either actively or passively. Groups can be a powerful place in which to learn change and grow; or they can keep you stuck in the identity of a group - such as in a self-help group where membership is dependent upon your being in need of the group's ongoing help and support.
With greater awareness, derived from a healthy group experience, you can become empowered to chose only life-enhancing groups in which to 'belong.'
By Maxine Harley Msc Integrative Psychotherapy - Creator of 'The Ripple Effect' Process. Also see http://www.the-ripple-effect.co.uk/blog.
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